Monday, December 27, 2010

acception

You know what?
I get that you're concerned about me, but I am an adult and it's not your business anymore.
Stop making me feel bad about it.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

singing the blues

I'm kind of really tired of the amount of negativity in the world.
Let's focus on the positive for once, people.

Monday, November 1, 2010

who really needs sleep anyway?

Nights like these are always fun.
You know what I'm talking about.
Lying in bed with your eyes closed, waiting for the alarm to go off.
The days ahead are going to be so great...

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

hey life

you're kinda funny sometimes.
you're kinda awesome sometimes.
and you kinda suck sometimes.

Monday, October 11, 2010

please

Stop thinking that you know everything about me and how I spend my time.
You don't know the beginning of it.
This is why we'll never be close - you just assume that I'm fucking my life up.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

ejwioaejfaklfdksfa

I'm crushing so hard! ahhhhhhh!
How will I go on living life as normally as I can when all I wanna do is obsess over this person and tell my friends everything about them?
ARGH!

Thursday, September 30, 2010

oh britney ur mah gurl

I didn't cry today.
~*~Stronger than yesterday.

Monday, September 27, 2010

fuck it

My biggest flaw is jealousy.
Just fuck off already.



Saturday, September 25, 2010

I don't mind

It's been raining a lot lately.
It makes me feel sad, but it's also kind of nice to be cozy and drink tea and watch the raindrops eat each other on my windows.
It also makes me appreciate the sun more. I took it for granted this summer.
I miss Calgary a lot right now. AKA party central!
I wanna snuggle in my queen sized bed with my dogs in the morning and be a party girl with my girls at night.
Soon babies, soon.

Sunday, September 12, 2010

blah blah blah

I have to wonder why I always manage to do this to myself.
I never get over my heartbreaks, I just attach myself to someone else to take away the pain I'm feeling.
And that leaves me confused and lonely.
I love that I will never entirely figure myself out.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

the joke's on me

it was really just all in my head.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

um excuse me?

Wow.
Just wow.
That was cold.

I don't want to call you out on that bullshit or anything, but that really hurts.

There's nobody around to help me with this. They were right about him. He was trouble.

Friday, September 3, 2010

back to square one

It's so much easier to love someone who hurts you than it is to be lonely.

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

the beginning of the end?

I mourned the loss of you tonight.
Why are things so drastically different from just a few days before?
It's like you're leaving already when you really just arrived.
I really hope you choose to stay in my life.

Sunday, August 29, 2010

fuckin finally

I am so ready for love that it hurts!

Monday, August 2, 2010

Thoughts From Gate D50

Love will come to you the second you stop trying to find it.
Open your mind and your heart, and you will be surprised at the discoveries you will find.
Don't overanalyze yourself. And don't zero in on the negative when you mistakenly do it.
Don't be critical of others. You will find that they in return will not be critical of you.
The only thing that really matters is what's happening to you now.
Forget the past. Forget the future. Stay in the present.
Listen.
Laugh. Cry.
Love.
Don't settle for less than what you deserve.

Monday, July 26, 2010

confessions

I am under the impression that you think I am someone to be feared. The truth is that I am absolutely terrified of what you could do to me, but I'll never let you know.

If you reject me this one last time, I don't know what I'll do. But you know what? I know how I deserve to be treated, and if you can't treat me properly, than saying goodbye to you will be that much easier.

Tuesday, July 6, 2010

sex sex sex

I am willing to face my fears and endure judgement like I have never known if it will give me a chance at spending the rest of my life with you.
I finally know what I want but am not sure how to pursue it.
I'm not really in any hurry to get it.
Last week I had a vision of us on our wedding day.
We'll see what happens.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

things will get interesting

I just want to love you.
Please let me love you.

Monday, May 31, 2010

this god forsaken month is over

Having you a little bit is better than not having you at all.

The only person who has my heart doesn't even want it.

Monday, May 17, 2010

does anybody even care tonight?

I feel like nobody wants to hear anything I have to say.
I know what I need, but have no idea how to obtain it.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

what do I do now?

I DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER

Sunday, April 18, 2010

mmhmm

I was so sure about things.
And now I'm not.
FUCK FUCK FUCK.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

wake up

My occupied mind is keeping my heart happy.
I fear that I will break down in my first spare moment.

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

fork in the road

I was told to be honest and to say how I felt.
But I really don't want to get hurt again.
You're unavailability is destroying me, but I'll never let you know it.

Sunday, March 28, 2010

I don't give a fuck if this seems angsty

I just wanted to let you know that you make me feel at peace with myself.
I wish you were sleeping next to me tonight.

when I don't know how to say something...

...The Beatles will say it for me.

She says she loves you
And you know that can't be bad.
Yes, she loves you
And you know you should be glad.

She said you hurt her so
She almost lost her mind.
But now she said she knows
You're not the hurting kind.

She says she loves you
And you know that can't be bad.
Yes, she loves you
And you know you should be glad. Ooh!

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

confession #242

I pretend that I don't know what's going on with me.
But I do know. And 99% of the time it scares the shit out of me.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

save the regret for the morning after

I appreciate your concern.
I know you don't want to see me get hurt again.
Believe me, I don't want to get hurt again.
But I'm going to make my own decisions. And I'm going to make them carefully.
And if I do get burned, it'll be my problem, not yours.
I love you all so much, and I don't want to let you down.

Monday, March 15, 2010

what do you do?

What do you do when the right thing to do is to walk away?
The right thing to do is the one that will leave you with nothing.
The right thing to do will leave you feeling lonely.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

just floating along

Over it and on to the next heartbreak.
I feel like I'm never going to win, but quitting is too easy.
This past month and a half has been absolutely insane. In a good way and a bad way.
And waiting for things to play out has been agonizing.

Unrelated note, please stop talking to me and prepare to be phased out.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

powerful words for someone who will never see them

I don't always pick perfect boys.
I don't always pick boys that are necessarily right for me.
But I do not, I repeat, DO NOT, pick losers.
Before you can love anyone else, you have to love yourself.

I don't even

I don't know what the hell I'm supposed to be feeling.
I'm euphoric, I'm depressed, I'm sketched out.
I never thought I'd feel this way again.
But I don't love you anymore.
No matter how much I want to.
No matter how much I try to.
But I want you to be happy.
I want us to get along now.
The time for resentment is over.

Friday, February 19, 2010

what the fuck

Just when you think you're right...

you're wrong.

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

I'll tell you what I want what I really really want

I figured it out.
But you'll probably say no.
And 10 months is a long time to wait.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

my only valentine

I wish I didn't lose most of my journal entries from high school.
I'm pretty sure I'd find an entry somewhere explaining the feeling I have right now.
I'm so conflicted and upset right now.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

oh god yes

I'm going to be okay.
I'm going to be just fine.
I'm going to pick up the pieces and start all over.

I can't believe I almost forgot that I had all the power in this scene.

Monday, January 25, 2010

oh don't even

I'm so nostalgic today!
I've been feeling so happy followed by bouts of sadness.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

uh...

yeah I know it's been like 2 months since I've updated but I'm not too concerned about it.
Things are stagnant and I do not like it.
I'm not really in to people right now.
I'm more concerned with what I'm doing and why I came here.